Dave is the Cosmo Guy in the July 2014 issue of Cosmopolitan. You can read the interview below and check out the scan in the gallery.
With back-to-back roles in Neighbors and 22 Jump Street, the Funny or Die regular (and James’s lil’ bro) is the man.
Your part in 22 Jump Street is pretty unforgettable …
Yes. I can confidently say that it’s the weirdest thing I’ve ever done on film — and I’ve done a lot of strange things.
Your Funny or Die videos are a riot. What cracks you up?
Christopher Mintz-Plasse — no one makes me laugh harder than he does. Also, my two enormous cats. They are 17-pound tabbies who love to spoon. There’s a lot of cat incest going on in my house.
If you were on Tinder, what would your tagline be?
“I go to sleep every night with 34 pounds of cat on top of me.” That would probably scare off 90 percent of the Tinder community, but for the 10 percent that embraces it, I’ve got nothing to hide from there.
Would you ever date one of James’s exes?
No. It’s a lose-lose situation. Either I’m dating the girl he used to date and it ends up horrible, or it ends up great, we get married, and then have awkwardness for the rest of our lives when James is around.
Can we talk about dick pics — have you ever sent one?
I don’t think I’ve ever sent a full-on dick pic. Maybe a bulge pic? Like pressing up against those jeans. But never a full-skin, graphic, close-up dick pic. I don’t think any girl wants to see that! Bulge pics are the new black.
@AndreaKCC: What are your guilty pleasures?
I recently got into The Voice. But I only like watching the first couple of rounds, when all the power is in the judges’ hands. It feels like once the vote is in America’s hands, it’s more of a popularity contest.